5 Reasons NOT to Use a Clothesline

Buckets of water are falling from the sky. It’s been raining like this for a good solid hour. This is absolutely the heaviest afternoon rain storm we’ve had all summer, complete with hail. The clothes I have on the line, that were almost dry and ready to come off the line, are now a soggy, dripping, absolutely soaking-wet mess. Blech.

You know who I blame for this? Not me, of course. I, like a responsible line drying gal, checked the weather today. Mr. Weatherman said there was a 15% chance of rain. Our weatherman has real talent, don’t you think? 

I’m so done with line drying, and yet, there seems to be this strange romanticism surrounding clothesline drying. I’ve seen all sorts of cute little articles about how and why we should all dry our clothes outside. Like, “If you line dry your laundry, your clothes will smell like sunshine.” And, “By line drying you’ll be saving money and the environment.” And maybe best of all, “It will be so relaxing.” Horseradish.

Today I’m going to take the glitter and glamour out of line drying for the benefit of everyone and set things straight. I give you: 

5 Reasons NOT to Use a Clothesline

1. Creates Unwanted Texture

This is by far the worst part about line dried clothes. Think sandpaper. Now think about it next to your skin. All the time. That is what you get when you line dry your clothes. Jeans are the worst but the flattened scratchy towels are definitely a close second. Unlike the cutesy articles, a stiff breeze will not leave your clothes “soft and wrinkle free”. You actually end up with quite the opposite.

2. Induces Stress

Most of us have enough stress in our lives but when you line dry, you get to enjoy infinitely more stress than usual. Will it rain today or will it not? When will it rain? Let’s say a storm is on the horizon and thunderbolts have started booming. You have a decision to make. Rescue your clothes that are stranded out on the line before the rains come or save your life? Unlike the popular notion, line drying is anything but relaxing.

3. Wastes Water, Money, and Time

At some point your laundry will get caught in a rain shower. When this happens, not if, you will have to gather up soaked, dripping wet, heavy, clothes, wring them out, and dump them back into your washing machine. You have to re-wash, re-hang, and re-dry everything, wasting water, money, time, and sanity. 

4. Invites Hitchhikers

Leaving your clothes hanging to dry outside for hours is not without consequence. Flying beetles, flying spiders, and little ants will end up on your clothes. If you don’t notice them as you are taking clothes off the line and folding them into your laundry basket, they will hitchhike right into your house. You’ll be in for a surprise when you open up your pajamas one evening to find a shiny little green beetle staring back at you. 

5. Produces Undesirable Results

The results of line drying are stiff scratchy clothes that stink. But wait, didn’t they say your clothes should smell like sunshine? If sunshine smells like stale air, dirt, and bee pee, then they’re right on. I’ll take the smell of scented bounce sheets over “sunshine” any day.

Honestly, dryers are such amazing inventions. Not only do they dry clothes efficiently and quickly, without any dependence on the weather, but they also fluff and soften. They even make your clothes smell like lavender, mango or strawberries, whatever you choose! Dryers even remove lint, grass, and little bits of trash from your clothes and puts it in one nice little area so you can grab it all at once to toss it. I think we can all stop reminiscing and romanticizing clotheslines. Dryers are far superior in everyway and I’m thrilled I don’t have to try to live without one for too much longer. 

Long live the dryer!

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